Its Our Anniversary
by
Lil AJ
As I sit in this coconut-milk bath, a slice of mango slips under my ass. It was Isis’s idea to celebrate our first anniversary in a candlelit bathroom, soaking in coconut milk and hot water, while we fondle each other with quartered mangos. Is that not the weirdest thing? But whatever my baby wants for this day, she gets. So mangos in my ass it is. I have to admit that it does feel nice. I never would have thought of this. Wow, a whole year has passed and we’re still together, happy to boot. I never thought we were going to make it this far. I hoped we had, but I didn’t think we would. My relationships never last this long. Something fucked up always happens. Either the other person isn’t ready to be committed or she’s a cheating, lying, hoe. Whatever the case, the shit never works out. So I just assumed that since everything was so great between me and Isis that something really awful was going to screw everything up. But for once I was wrong, and I’m glad. Ok, I know I have a lot of explaining to do considering the last you heard I was begging for her back. Well obviously she came back, but it wasn’t easy getting her to come back. So while she’s setting up the bedroom let me tell you what went down.After she got the letter she responded but it wasn’t what I was hoping for.“I don’t know what to say to that. I mean, it sounds good, but I don’t know.” She said.“I understand how you feel. I just had to tell you how I felt and that I’m really sorry about what happened. I don’t want to lose you.” I said.“All I asked was that you end the little sleepovers but you couldn’t do that. Its like nothing I say or feel matters to you, so how am I supposed to believe anything you say?”“I know. Just trust me.”“I can’t.”“Yeah you can.”“I don’t know. I’ll think about it. I need time.”“Fine. Whenever you decide let me know.”I don’t even remember how long it took her to decide honestly, but it felt like forever. All I know is that I found myself taking another four hour trip to see her. We had a fight somewhere in between that last conversation and the trip but that isn’t important. What is important is what happened when I got there. She was late picking me up. I thought she was still mad at me and just left my ass sitting in the bus station. She finally came and I didn’t know whether to be relieved or scared. She hugged me and I guess whatever animosity she was feeling melted away because she was all smiles. We got in the car and drove to the house. The whole way there we just jabbered on about everything, never even mentioning all that had taken place before I got there. During my stay we had a hurricane, a blackout, and we fucked almost my whole two week stay. It was great.When it was time for me to go it was emotional. When I got back home it was worse. We had already started planning my return trip. What we didn’t know was that we would have more cases of the ex, this time on her end, and I would be right back on another Greyhound less than a week after I had gotten home. This was now my third trip to see Isis in two months. This back and forth shit was killer and there was no way to stop it. The good thing about this third trip was that she came back with me. The bad thing was that this time I had to put her on the bus to go back home which seemed to hurt way more than when she put me on the bus. This shit had to end. I took one more trip to see Isis and stayed for about a month. After that it was sealed. I moved from NYC to boring ass MD to be with the woman I loved. Sappy as shit ain’t it? Oh but it gets worse. Everything is wonderful. We’re huggy and smoochy all the time, making the free world sick. We say “I love you” a billion times a day. We talk on the phone, email, and instant message each other all day long. In addition to all that, I could count the arguments we had on one hand. Some were worse than others. Oh you thought I was going to say everything is roses and rainbows and we never fight? Bullshit. She gets on my nerves and I get on hers. She snores and I whine. She’s television and I’m music. She’s hard and I’m soft. She’s water and I’m fire. And because of all those things sometimes we clash. Nobody has a perfect relationship, not even a relationship with God is perfect. Each of you will do something to piss the other off, but you work it out. Love is happiness, sadness, anger, fear, and most importantly it is compromise. Love is complex and sometimes you want to send love to Hell because you just can’t be bothered going on the emotional rollercoaster ride, but you never do. Why? Because the person you’re on the ride with is holding your hand and once all the loops and drops are done, and you see that straight path ahead you know the ride has come to an end, and when you look over to your left or your right that special person is still there holding your hand.Isis and I have held each other’s hand through the loops and drops thus far and as we continue on our ride I’m sure there will be many more. We’re both still growing as people and with growth comes a lot of rollercoaster rides, but as long as she is sill holding my hand when we reach that straight path I know it was all worth it. Now let me get my wrinkly, mango-covered, coconut-milked ass out of this tub. Its been real, but I need to finish celebrating my anniversary. Besides if I take too long, she’ll fall asleep.
